By Ocean Vuong
If I should wake & the Ark
the Ark already
gone
If there was one shivering thing
at my side
If the snow in his hair
was all that was left
of the fire
If we ran through the orchard
with our mouths
wide open
& still too small
for amen
If I nationed myself
in the shadow
of a colossal wave
If only to hold on
by opening—
by kingdom come
give me this one
eighth day
let me enter
this nearly-gone yes
the way death enters
anything fully
without a trace
Taken from Emergence Magazine
When are you most happy?
Do you have a favorite place you have visited? Where is it?
I’m grateful to live by the sea.
After a traumatic time in my life, I advocated for myself. I needed time to heal and forget. To be soothed and held.
So I proposed to my family a move to the coast was needed. That’s nearly 15 years ago now. And maybe that move has been thrown back in my face at different times by certain people, I’ve never regretted the move.
Being able to see the sea daily, even if there are times I forgot and neglect this ritual, has been beneficial for my soul, n never mind my body and mind. My soul.
The sea is my soul food. And there have been many times, many times in the past, now and probably to come when I will need this soul food more than I really know/feel.
And she’s there for me. The North Sea is on my doorstep. And I greet her with open arms. She is never the same sea twice and I take my direction/ way of being from her so that I’m living my life within the expansive realms of self-expression rather than within the confines offered to me via this so-called society/ culture.
The sea supports me, being me. And I give thanks to her for that. But I also appreciate her beauty and power and way of being which is on her own terms. you’ve got to love that!
My study for day 4 on the West Highland Way is waterfalls. Water has been a reoccurring theme on this journey in more ways than one. with the Loch being flooded in parts, with amber weather warnings of more rain and flooding, rivers and brooks swelling with all this excess water, well there’s no getting away from it all. Water water everywhere. But I’m not complaining because it need refreshing and eventful and a different walk this time around. I’m grateful to be here and to be blessed with each and every waterfall. All different and unique in their own way.
The calming waters of Loch Lomond graced us as we walked yesterday. After heavy rainfall over the weekend, the Loch was swollen and flooded the West Highland Way in parts.
It’s funny how that can be a cause for concern in terms of getting wet but then not thinking twice about stripping off and getting the whole body wet for a dip!
It was so worth it though.
Hello hello. how goes it with you?
Call it the teacher still in me after all theses years, but I just love to have the six weeks summer holidays off the clock. In the past, it was easier to make it so what with having the kids off school and everything. And now, well I just love the feeling of freedom the summer holidays give me.
I let go of trying to do everything for everyone and I allow myself the time and space to fill my creative pot. Things slow down, I rest a lot and eat and drink a lot. And just {BE}.
I’m truly grateful that I’m able to take this extended break and not worry too much about the bank balance. That doesn’t mean I’m rolling in it, but it does mean that I’ve made allowances for this break through my actions and behaviours throughout the year. And we just make do also. Nothing extravagant happens over the summer. We usually stay close to home but we focus on downtime, and free or low spend activities. It’s about being together that’s the important bit.
So as the summer holidays come to at end nearly, we’ve got a bit of time left to go visit family, get into some kind of water source, sea or pool, and fill our creative pots with a gallery or museum visit or two. Simple living which fills me with joy because I’m not trying to live up to some kind of ideal or perfection or keep the one kid left at home run ragged or totally occupied all of the time. I believe in allowing kids getting bored as that’s when the imagination kicks in. Hence my love of rest, downtime, and doing nothing. As in the scheme of things, on the outside it might look like ‘doing’ nothing, but inside sparks are sparking and foundations are being laid for the new season on the horizon.
Autumn, my favourite season is just around the corner. And I can feel the excitement rising already. You like my plush pumpkins in the image above? Autumn plans are afoot.
It’s been a few days (weeks?) since I’ve been here. And I do hate it when I don’t turn up here because I’m missing out on opportunities for connection, with self and you, at the same time as the longer it goes in between posts the harder it is to get back here.
But I’m back and it was something I wrote on my journal last month that spurred me on to turn up. And I wanted to share it with you as it inspired me to feel better.
And these aren’t my usual activities which I go to to feel better but looking over the list this morning, I can honestly say I’ve been leaning into them the last few weeks without knowing it’s been so. I love when we get the chance to take a step back and reflect and see our journey. I’m so grateful for that.
So what has been making me feel better:
1. Cleaning my space. Be that handbag, bedroom, side table or whole house. I’ve been reaping the rewards of moving my body in cleaning/tidying up and then having the satisfaction of sitting down in a decluttered clear space. It helps the mind to gain clarifying also.
2. Eating something healthy. I’ve been deep in essay writing mode and have been living on toast and crisps and wine! But when I take the time, a break from the grind, to make a salad, or stir-fry and sit and eat mindfully, my body is not only fuelled with the good stuff but I’m resting in a space of joy. I enjoy my food and have the double whammy of knowing I’ve just given myself health.
3. Playing some good music. I’m known to have the tunes blasting in the car, especially as I’m using a friend’s mini convertible. Roof down, tunes high and I’m singing along. But I forget I can do the same within my home. Okay maybe not as loud as when outside. But putting on the mini speaker linked to my Tidal music account, I can move throughout my house listening to the music I love. Music that inspires. Music that I can’t help moving my body to. Music that brings back good memories. And bad. But still manages to get a smile out of me.
4. Lighting a candle. This is a simple act. One I’ve been doing more and more recently as I have candles in every room of my house. I’ve been having them on repeat as I attempt to create a welcoming ambience for anyone viewing the flat. Yes the landlord is selling the flat we’re renting so we have to move. So more people are flowing through the space and having candles glowing is my way of keeping the air clean and scented. It reminds me to take deep breaths and trust that everything is going to turn out for the best. Vanilla, cherry, cinnamon and lavender are my favourites at the moment.
5. Drinking water. Oh my. Now this one is a game changer but I admit I forget it. Daily. Water. I love water inside and out but when I get buried under tasks and emotions, I forget to drink water. That feeling of cold liquid journeying down my throat through my chest to my gut is refreshing, revitalising and a blessing. It only take a moment but still obstacles get in my way. I’m carrying a gallon sized bottle around with me as a means of getting more and enough water. It’s a practice and I’m leaning into it.
6. Sleep a little ( or more). Maybe it’s my age. Menopause. Or the time of year, or my body and mind and soul is just racked with anxious vibes but sleep has been evading me of late. But I’m not going to make it an issue. I’ll take sleep when it comes. And if I can help it, I’ll nap when I feel tired and stay in bed that extra hour if my body calls for it. I rest in other ways too. Be that zoning out in front of the TV, reading or an evening walk. All are a rest from ruminations and allow me to switch off.
7. And finally BREATHE. Yes yes yes. We breathe all the time as it keeps us alive. But how deeply are we breathing? It wasn’t until I picked my meditation practice up again did I realised how long I’m been breathing in the shallows not having the utilising the full capacity of my lungs. Living in the shallows means I’ve been panicking, being on edge, anxious, living on scraps of air when I could have been taking and enjoying big juicy expansive breaths that calm and recalibrate my whole body. I’m breathing deeply. I’m stopping what I’m doing/ being at times to take a few deep breathes. They reoxygenate my body and give me pause for gratitude. Gratitude for being alive in this moment.
I hope you find some inspiration in these practices and try a few. They make me feel better and sometimes we all can do with a reminder of what does make us feel better so we can lean into them more often and more deeply.
I totally forgot yesterday, My head was down as I concentrate on my essay I’m writing. But today I remember. And I’ve signed up. The Rise Up Rooted Symposium is live. Check out the schedule for the free virtual symposium about about nature, connection and rewinding.
My conversation is live tomorrow then I share about my relationship with the sea and the healing properties. But there are some ready to be watched now. It’s free to join. Just add your emails and start watching. You can upgrade to an all access pass which means you get to watch all the videos in your own time and pace. I’ll get a percentage of the fee. But no pressure. Watch for free and tell me what you think.
Mine is out tomorrow and can be watched for 48 hours afterwards for free.
Living Wild Studios 