even though the whole of 2025 has felt like a long, slow, much needed hibernation.
seasons
A Creative Sketchbook, Dec 2025


I’m not sure how my creative sketchbook differs from my visual journal. Intention maybe.
Perhaps, I think , I’m attempting to develop my art practice within a designated space. A study maybe.
I haven’t really been in the thick of my art making practice since the preparation for my Baltic exhibition back in 2022-3.
This was quickly followed with the writings and (re)drafts of Darkling, my poetry/hybrid collection published in October 2024.
After this 2025 has been a period of extended rest and refusal.
But something has been niggling me. The desire to create with paint again. the desire to play without expectations and outcomes/ products.
I’ve just scratched the itch through scrolling through Pinterest. Adding another abstract or landscape painting to a board that I’ll probably not look at again.
But it satisfied this niggling feeling. Until it didn’t.
It was going back into the classroom. Completing a few days of supply that pushed me over the edge.
The time I gave away for money. The time I’d lost pursuing my own pursuits. And realising that I wasn’t pursuing all the pursuits I wanted to pursue in the time I had/have.
So out came a creative sketchbook, inspired by the 30 days sketchbook challenge created by Cheryl Taves over at Insight Creative.
This is as much as I’m willing to share for now about the challenge, my creative sketchbook, processes and insights.
One of my rules is that it’s just for my eyes only. I want to see how this rule changes my practice. I want to create without fear but with curiosity. I want to give myself all the freedom without worrying about what others will think or say or comment on.
It’s not like I’m hanging on other people’s responses and reactions but I have gotten into a habit of just sharing anything and everything on my blog and I’m curious to see what happens when I keep things to myself.
Just for my eyes, heart, and soul only.
So far I’m enjoying the process of the challenge and I’m reflecting and paying attention to what makes my heart sing, what’s my creative vocabulary, what pushes my energies.
Do doubt whatever I explore within my creative sketchbook will be showing up in everything that I create. In everything who I {BE}. For sure.
Out of sorts I am

These last few weeks of November have found me out of sorts if I’m being honest.
Things that I’ve committed to, or poured my energy into haven’t gone my way or come to fruition.
The disappointment has been at times crippling as well as left me questioning.
Am I good enough? Am I putting my eggs in the wrong basket? Am I really going to bring about change in a system not looking to change?
The sheer effort to keep pushing that boulder up the hill is taking its toll. There’s a voice that’s getting louder saying, why bother?
What the fuck am I doing anyway?
It doesn’t help having these thoughts and being ill too. It doesn’t help that I feel I’m making progress and then turn the next corner to just get knocked back.
While I sit and lick my wounds, doing all the things I said I would never do again, I have to ask myself what am I doing? Where am I going? And would it be just better for me if I stopped caring so much, stopped fighting the ways things are and just give up/ in and accept the crumbs I’m given and be grateful.
Like I said – out of sorts I am!
A good day for leaf sensing



A heavy system

catch the colours while you can



Daily Walk/016

on the turn, mixed pickings,
still some sweet juice to be had,
to stain fingers and tongues
Daily Walk/ 009

a burst of autumnal rusts and reds
a westerly-north wind, evening coming on
a warm meal in my belly
be in the moment, absorb it.
Daily Walk/007

the beauty of autumn is scars
and well -worn wounds,
a weathering soul and willing heart