changes

#sheofthewildwrites – Wounds

| Sheree

Day 3: in my mind

Our wounds are often the openings into the best and most beautiful parts of us.
– David Richo

My wounds ooze daily,
festering on the tip
of my tongue, lodging
in my throat.

Sometimes, they swirl
like a cyclone
through my ribcage,
aching deep inside.

My wounds are hidden,
hidden deep within my gut,
wearing away the lining,
washing away anything good
anything whole.

My wounds are fleshy and harsh
and vibrant and painful.
But you wouldn’t know
to look at me.

I smile. I laugh. I perform
kind gestures. I pretend.
My wounds are hazardous to life,
carrying a warning sign.

In my mind, I am healing.
I do the work, convince myself
all can be well. That I am worthy.
That I am enough.

But this is useless
if not translated
into the body.
These healing vibes
need to be transmitted

along my blood lines,
pumped into the centre
of my wounds
as it’s the body
that remembers.

#sheofthewildwrites #writersofinstagram #womenscreativity #poetsofinstagram #iamwriting #poetry

My Creative Year in Review – Part 1

| Sheree

In recent years during December I’ve taken the time and space to reflect back on the past twelve months in terms of my creative life. It is always inspiring and surprising to remember the things I have achieved as well as the mistakes I have learnt from along the way.

Following this practice of review means that I enter the next year, fired up and focused about the choices I want to make going forward.
If I had to sum up 2017 in 3 words it would include courage, voice and business.

Let’s take a look at each month ( the year will be split into two parts) and see what happened along the way to carry me into 2018, older but so much more younger in terms of wonder and curiosity.

January came in cold and dark. The ideal time to go deeper into my practice of hygge. During my winters walks #TheHealingPeopertiesOfTheSeas was conceived as a one day symposium all about our relationship with water. This has still to take place but the concept is out there and can be found on IG  and Twitter. Holding this idea throughout the year has meant that I’ve been curating short 10 second films around water. These will be available to watch and add to during 2018.

February was the beginning of my exploration of voice. Having been chosen to take part in an Arvon foundation residential course for writers wanting to make change happen, I met a whole heap of interesting people who supported me on my journey of claiming and using my authentic voice around the theme of my body in the environment. This led into further publications of my creative non-fiction poetic writing here. I was also exploring my voice through painting by completing Painting the Feminine with Connie Solera. This was another opportunity for me to embody my multi-layered identity, providing the tools and techniques to support my self-expression.

March saw me return to Iceland as part of a self-directed residency with The Westfjords Residency. To spend an extended amount of time in an isolated village miles from a major town was testing. I questioned what I was trying to achieve by doing this, in terms of my creativity as well as my life. It was unsettling to some extent as all my usual boundaries were missing and for a while there I did flounder. I also experienced some racial abuse while in Reykjavik which made me question my relationship with the whole country. March was definitely a learning curve which manifested in a deeper love of Iceland which meant before I left I made plans to share this love with my family.

April was another month of learning as I not only completed a Woodland leader training course in the Highlands of Scotland but I also went live with my new website and brand name Living Wild Studios. I’d procrastinated enough and it was time to be seen, showcasing all of my creative adventures under one roof.
It was a scary time but one that I wouldn’t change as I went with my gut and created a beautiful website I’m proud to call my home. It’s varied and dynamic and changing to reflect how I’m changing.

May seemed to have gone in a blur. I know it was a time of disrupted plans due to Alan’s mam being in hospital for an extended stay. It was a time of sticking close to home and putting my family first and foremost. But I did try to keep moving forward with Living Wild Studios as a business, extending my reach through social media. To be honest, I didn’t really enjoy this month as I was trying to operate in a way that wasn’t being authentic to me. I had to explore my relationship with social media, with the pubic arena at large and withdraw to do so. This was good for me, for my sanity.

I continued my social media hiatus into June. I felt I was just settling into my own space and voice by the end of May so wanted more time away from distractions to listen within. This was an important month for me to dive deep into the Creative Facilitator Training I had started with Lisa Sonora this year. I had been building up a resistance to the course as it wasn’t as I had thought it would be. I expected more. But then I realised that this is an experiential course and I get out of it what I put into it. All along I’m using myself and my experiences and beliefs as the learning examples so in order to learn and move forward I had to be more engaged. A light bulb moment which saw me returning at the end of the month to social media to share my visual journaling practice, the foundation of my creativity, much more extensively and thoroughly than before.

ten: five

| Sheree

1. A grey morning.
2. That heavy feeling when you should get up but don’t want to.
3. The canned background noise of joy.
4. Big meaty raindrops on the bedroom window.
5. Icy air creaking in under doors and between boards.
6. The bitter taste of resentment.
7. The overwhelming feeling that this too will pass.
8. There’s no need to be afraid of death, he said.
9. I pull the duvet up and over.
10. My shower can wait.

#SheOfTheWildWrites

| Sheree

She of the Wild announced this challenge at the beginning of the year. We’re doing a daily writing challenge for January 2018.

Use the prompts to fuel each day’s writing, then you can share what you write with the writing community on social media, Instagram mostly, using the hashtag #sheofthewildwrites.

This is a great way to get back into a daily writing pracfice. I am most grateful to Beth Morey for organising this as I know this challenge is going to stretch me but in a good way. Join in.

Iceland Insights

| Sheree

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I’ve been thinking of 2018. I’ve been making plans. The New Year will see me visiting Iceland again for a few days. I’m hoping to catch a glimpse of the Northern Lights. While on retreat in March in Pingeryi, I briefly got to witness some pale ivory lights by down the sea shore. Their movement was magical and sublime. I’m getting ready for more.

In preparation for the creative retreat planned for June, I’ve revisiting in January to complete the final touches also. As a means of getting me in the mood over Christmas, I’ve been creating an Iceland Oracle deck of cards through a course from Tara Leaver. These cards are linked in with #icelandinsights; a photo/ journal prompt challenge I’m running during the month of January.

I’ll be posting images and text each day during January 2018 on IG, Facebook, Twitter and here. And you are more than welcome to join me. Use the #icelandinsights and we’ll be able to find each other.

Favourite photo of me …

| Sheree

It’s difficult to choose a favourite photo of myself for this day’s reflection. I have loads of photos of myself after taking up self-portraiture for healing a few years ago. If you’ve read The Phoenix Soul interview in November you’d know there was a time I couldn’t look myself in the eye. Taking daily photos became my medicine and helped me turn disgust into love. But it is a continuous practice.

At the moment, this image is a favourite. Why? Because within this image I see a soft beauty with a quiet strength. This woman knows who she is and isn’t afraid to show the world this. Within the light and shade there is an open vulnerability.  She chooses love instead of hate every time that’s why she can stare straight into the lens without turning away, without closing down. Here I see an open face comfortable with the gaze.

I let go of …

| Sheree

worrying, wasting time thinking about whatever anyone else thinks about me, says about me, or judges me.

It’s a practice but it’s the best thing I have ever let go of. I am so much happier and freer living comfortable in my own bubble of golden light.

5 things …

| Sheree

#decemberreflections2017 day 13 – 5 things about me

1. I’m still in my pjs and dressing gown today. Just don’t give a hoot.
2. When I was about 8 or 9, I used to dress up like Miss Marple right down to the tasseled shoes.
3. I have a PhD in Creative Writing but don’t crow about it as the nasty people tried to take it away from me. But failed.
4. My favourite colour is red like my core, my inner wisdom, my soul.
5. I’m a Queen.